In a few hours I'll be heading to Minnesota. This trip is the culmination of months of soul searching and decision-making to try and figure out what to do and where to settle. I have changed my mind so many times that I'm getting motion sickness! I'll be sorting through my stuff, selling what I don't want, and packing up what's left for the drive to California.
I know I have many fears - some justified and some not. One that weighed heavy on my mind was not being in Minnesota while Nate is still living there. He had been gone for over 4 years - having graduated from The Berklee College of Music in Boston - and returned to Minneapolis in September of 2009. Less than 3 months later I packed up my car and headed west. I already have some self-imposed mom-guilt about that decision - and fear that I would regret making the decision to settle in California.
Honestly - it really is MY issue in that I'm sad to miss going to his gigs, going out to eat, and basically just being around and available for him like my mom instincts dictate. He's a self-sufficient young man and fully capable of taking care of himself. He proved that time and time again while he was away at college and since returning to Minnesota.
I finally broached the subject with him and he helped alleviate my fears. He is happy, busy, motivated, and looking forward to his future with wonderful anticipation. How could a parent ask for any more positive validation than that! ...and I think he kind of likes the idea of having a California connection.
Thank you dear son of mine - I love you forever!
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